Young Randy
What had you at lunchtime, young Randy my son?
What had you at lunchtime, my darling young man?
I et chicken nuggets mam, lae’me alone,
For I’m weary wi’ soccer andfain wauldlie doun.
But were they organic, young Randy my son?
But were they organic, my darling young man?
I dinnae knae mather, now lae’me alone,
For I’m weary wi’ soccer andfain wauldlie doun.
Who knows what was in them, young Randy my son!
Hormones are toxic, my darling young man!
Gae ask the lunch ladies an’ lae’me alone,
For I’m weary wi’ soccer andfain wauldlie doun.
You’re acting lethargic, young Randy my son!
I fear you’ve been poisoned, my darling young man!
T’were but chicken nuggets, mam, lae’me alone,
For I’m weary wi’ soccer andfain wauldlie doun.
I’m calling the school board, young Randy my son.
I’m calling the sheriff, my darling young man.
I’ll be in my chambers, mam, lae’me alone,
For I’m weary wi’ soccer andfain wauldlie doun.
ANON.